Lord Varys: "I've always hated the bells. They ring for horror. A dead king, a city under siege..."
Tyrion Lannister: "A wedding."
Lord Varys: "Exactly."

"Don't fight for a king. Don't fight for his kingdoms. Don't fight for honor, don't fight for glory, don't fight for riches, because you won't get any. This is your city Stannis means to sack. That's your gate he's ramming. If he gets in it will be your house that burns. Your gold he steals, your women he rapes. Those are brave men knocking at our door. Let's go kill them!"

Bronn: "Don't get killed."
Tyrion: "Nor you, my friend."
Bronn: "Oh... are we friends now?"
Tyrion: "Of course we are. Just because I pay you for your services doesn't diminish our friendship."
Bronn: "Enhances it, really."
Tyrion: "Oh, "enhances". Fancy word for a sellsword."
Bronn: "Been spending time with fancy folks."

"Any man dies with a clean sword, I'll rape his fucking corpse! "

"Tears aren't a woman's only weapon. The best one's between your legs."

"The worst ones always live."
[about Joffrey]

"Praying for the gods to have mercy on us all? The gods have no mercy, that's why they are gods."