Runaway Bride

"Hi, I'm Cindy, Maggie's unmarried cousin."

"'How does she get all those guys to propose? She's not even that beautiful'. Bite me, paper boy!"
[reads note on Ike's mirror]

Maggie: "Who makes these things?"
Peggy: "Calm down. The veil is not attacking you."

Mrs. Pressmann: "I'm thinking of changing back to my maiden name."
Walter Carpenter: "Can you still remember it?"

Maggie: "Bless me Father for I have sinned. My last confession was... well. Anyway, I have sorta a technical question. I've been having bad thoughts, really bad thoughts."
Priest Brian: "Of an impure nature?"
Maggie: "No, No, I want to destroy this man's life, career everything. I want revenge. Now on a sins scale how bad is that? Can I 'Hail Mary' my way out of that?"

"Hi, leave a message after the beep. If you want to send me a fax, then buy me a fax machine."

"A girl can't get married in flannel!"

"You're a cynical, exploitive, mean-hearted creep who wouldn't know real love if it bit him in the armpit."