Bad Moms * Quotes

"Sometimes I take the balls and shove them up there too because at least, you know, they're firm."

Amy: "I'm so sorry, but you're going to actually have to start doing your own homework from now on."
Dylan: "I am a slow learner, remember?"
Amy: "You're not a slow learner, you're just entitled... do you know what 'entitled' means?"
Dylan: "No. Because I'm a slow learner."
Amy: "It means that mummy and daddy have been spoiling you, and now you think that the world owes you something, but it doesn't. And if you don't learn how to work hard now, then you're going to just grow up to be like another entitled little white dude who thinks he's awesome for no reason. And then you'll start a Ska Band and it'll be awful and you'll be mean to girls, and you'll grow this ironic moustache to look interesting but you won't actually be interesting, and I'm not okay with that so would you please, please just do your own homework!?"

Gwendolyn: "I called this emergency PTA meeting to address and issue that affects the safety of our children."
Vicky: "Terrorism."
Gwendolyn: "The bake sale."
Amy: "Is this a joke?"
Gwendolyn: "What's that now?"
Amy: "I can't do this anymore. I'm done."

Amy: "She's a bully. We have to bring down the perfect moms."
Carla: "I say we go punch that chick right in the tits."
Amy: "Yes! Great."
Carla: "I'm in."

Gwendolyn: "Hey, Amy, PTA meeting at 2, will we see you there?"
Amy: "No. bye."

Gwendolyn: "Are those store bought donut holes, Amy?"
Amy: "Oh, um..."
Gwendolyn: "I'm going to destroy you."

Carla: "I made out with so many women tonight."
Kiki: "Guys, I really like whippets."