The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

"Here I am, brain the size of a planet, and they ask me to take you to the bridge. Call that job satisfaction, 'cause I don't."

"Time is an illusion. Lunchtime, doubly so."

"She's lying. She's skinny, and she's pretty, and she's lying!"
[talking about Trilian]

Lunkwill: "Do you..."
Deep Thought: "Have an answer for you? Yes. But you're not going to like it."
Fook: "Please tell us. We must know!"
Deep Thought: "Okay. The answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything is..."
[up comes wild cheers from audience before silence comes in]
Deep Thought: "42."

"I've calculated your chance of survival, but I don't think you'll like it."

"OK. Leave this to me. I'm British. I know how to queue."

Arthur: "So this is it. We're going to die."
Ford: "Yes. Would you like a hug?"
Arthur: "No."

"Not that anyone cares what I say, but the restaurant is at the OTHER end of the Universe."