Barney: "Christmas, my friend. Please tell me you ain't going through this."
Christmas: "Of course I am. Look at that girl. Who wouldn't marry her?"
Barney: "She cheated on you."
Christmas: "It was a half-cheat."
Barney: "Which is?"
Christmas: "The other side of a half-truth. The facts are murky."
Barney: "Murky. I hate to break this to you, pal, but your girlfriend over there has a world-class cheating gene."
Christmas: "I should stab you in the heart."
Barney: "Too late."