The Hangover

"Drivin' drunk. Classic!"

"That's my grandma's ring. She made it all the way through the holocaust with that thing. It's legit."

Stu: "Why don't we remember a God damn thing from last night?"
Phil: "Obviously because we had a great fucking time."

Stu: "That is not Doug."
Mr. Chow: "What're you talking about, Willis? That him!"
Stu: "No, I'm sorry, Mr. Chow, that's not our friend, he... it's..."
Alan: "The Doug we're looking for is a white."

Stu: "You are a fucking moron!"
Alan: "Your language is offensive."
Stu: "Fuck you!"

Stu: "Here's something I would like to remind you two of: our best friend Doug is probably face down in a ditch right now with a meth head butt-fucking his corpse!"
Alan: "That's highly unlikely."

"I look like a nerdy hillbilly!"

Stu: "Ewh! Alan, did you just eat sofa pizza?"
Alan: "Yes."