Wilson

Warren Kudo: "Here she is."
Wilson: "Who?"
Warren Kudo: "It looks like your ex-wife put this girl up for adoption seventeen years ago."

Wilson: "Working man, hey? Forty years from now you're going to be on your deathbed saying, 'Where did it all go? How did we end up like this?!'"
Train Passenger: "There's a lot of seats, you know, in this train."

"My wife left me seventeen years ago. I just need to move on, find somebody new, not you necessarily."

Wilson: "So, tell me, friend, have you heard the good new?"
[he shows a copy of the bible]
Bus Passenger: "Oh, no, I'm, no, thank you."
Wilson: "I'm just f*cking with you! Jesus doesn't give a shit."

"I'm just lucky I figured it out a long time ago. Life is lonely and miserable and hard."

"Remember when you were a kid? Everyday seemed like it was in technicolor, and then you grow up. And then you wonder..."